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Three Years Later

I’m currently traveling home to Phoenix (fiancé-less, sadly) to start this whirlwind process of planning a wedding! Everything up to this point has been research and narrowing in on ideas since, obviously, we live 4000 miles away from our wedding destination. I have one week to find a venue and a dress. Thankfully I have a mother and 3 sisters who have been willing and eager to be hands-on helpers by visiting sites ahead of time and scheduling appointments for me. The pressure is on, but I’m up for the challenge! 

In the meantime, staying focused on the end result of marrying my best friend is my main goal. As it’s been almost a year to the day that I moved to Anchorage and we just reached our 3 year mark of being in each others’ lives, I find it fitting to tell our full story. I love reminiscing about the details of our journey thus far. In case you don’t know me by now, I tend to drag stories out way longer than necessary, so bear with me through my longwinded-ness. Plus, I have a 3 hours to kill during this layover. And another disclaimer: I’ve been awake since 4pm yesterday after 5 hours of sleep, so rambling is inevitable. 

Anywho... 

On May 27th, 2011, I was 7 months into nursing school in Phoenix, and my classmate Kenny invited me to his housewarming party in Ahwatukee. I dragged my besty Diana along with me in case I didn’t know anybody. The only people there when we arrived were Kenny’s roommates and a few out-of-town friends. I didn’t know a single one of them, but Diana and I awkwardly introduced ourselves to everyone including a particularly attractive fella leaning against the kitchen counter named Cory.

It wasn’t long before he sat himself next to me and started chatting me up. He and his friend Shawn were stationed at an Air Force base in New Mexico at the time. Shawn knew Kenny from high school and decided to visit for the weekend, so Cory spontaneously decided to tag along. He also told me he would be transferring to Alaska by the end of the year. As far as I could tell, there was absolutely no potential future relationship with this guy. No way would I ever consider getting into a long-distance military relationship, especially when I’d have to travel to the arctic to be with him. I assumed we had nothing real in common anyway. Still, I couldn’t ignore the butterflies in my stomach when I caught his gaze as he playfully flirted. When the night ended and we exchanged numbers, I laughed when he took my hand and kissed it. He sure was a charmer, but I was convinced that that would be the last we ever saw of each other.

Despite my reluctance to get involved in any way with him, I found myself friending him on Facebook the next day and eagerly awaiting further contact. On Sunday, we texted back and forth for nearly his entire ride back to NM. I couldn’t believe how much we actually had in common from past employment at Quiznos to our families’ involvement with foster-care. Over the next few weeks, texts turned into phone calls and eventually Skype dates. Our conversations grew deeper as we discussed faith and values and convictions. I was floored at how completely honest and vulnerable he was with me. Connecting with him so easily made me even more disappointed that there was no way of a real future with him. We agreed early on that even though we liked each other, it made the most sense to remain friends only. (Ha!) I’ll never forget, however, the first time he asked me out on a hypothetical date. I said yes, of course, while thinking to myself how completely unlikely it was.

Sure enough, after “hypothetically” discussing plans to visit me, I woke up one Saturday morning (August 6th, to be exact) to him calling me and telling me he was in Phoenix. He had gotten off work at 1am and decided to drive all night to see me. I remember feeling so excited yet so hesitant considering how much I liked him and what little hope I had in a real relationship. In the end, I decided to enjoy the limited time I would get to spend with him. Our first date started at Starbucks and led to dinner at Culver’s, briefly shopping at Metro Mall (so romantic, right?) and dessert at the Cheesecake Factory. I was surprised at how comfortable it felt and how effortlessly we enjoyed each other. As ridiculous as it sounds, the moment I knew we had something special was when we both randomly referred to the same obscure Veggie Tales song at the exact same time. I was thrilled when he kissed me goodnight before dropping me off at home. After spending time with him the next day and sending him off back to NM, I knew I had to see him again.

For Labor Day weekend, we arranged a get-together in Tucson including a few of my close friends and him and Shawn. It was then that he told me that he had been in love with me since the moment he met me and he wanted to do whatever it took to keep me. He had even requested for cancelation of his orders to Alaska. I knew I wanted the same thing, but I was so reluctant to let myself completely fall for him, especially when his request was denied. After a lot of prayer and analyzing, I decided I had to give this a shot despite my fears of the unknown. I was able to visit him in NM twice after that, and we planned on spending a week in April during my spring break in Illinois to visit his family. We would go 6 months without seeing each other, but we were ready to go for it.  
 
 

As soon as he got to Anchorage, however, the realization of how difficult it would be hit him hard. He faced potential deployment to Japan which would ruin our April plans, and other challenges of long-distance started to stack up. Reluctantly, he soon decided to end it before we got in too deep. (Since I clearly can’t explain his feelings and reasoningd as well as he can, I’ll keep this part brief). Needless to say, I was furious and hurt. I spent a week fuming until he called me to try to make amends. (Much later on, he would tell me that the moment he hung up the phone after we broke up was the moment he realized he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me.) At the time, he apologized for everything and after a looong heart-to-heart, we agreed to be friends. I was still hesitant knowing that friendships with exes can be messy and complicated, but I figured there was not harm in keeping in touch. It’s not like we’d ever be seeing each other in person. (Little did I know, he had every intention of winning me back.) 

Long story short (yeah right), that break we had was the very best thing for us at the time. We got to know each other on a new level that drew us closer and rebuilt the trust that was lost. I had a pretty strong hunch that he still wanted a relationship, but I was determined to keep things platonic and discouraged him from the notion. Until all of those gushy feelings started flooding back, and Cory talked about using the leave he had previously set aside for April to come visit me in Phoenix. I knew it was risky, but I would stick to my guns and remain friends. Until I saw him for the first time in 6 months, and that was pretty much the end of it. All of the fears of the unknown still loomed, but on April 18th, 2012, I knew I was in love with him for good.
 
 
 

That summer, I visited Anchorage for the first time and started to seriously consider the possibility of relocating to be with him. By Christmas, I had made up my mind that I would apply for jobs up there right after graduation. The hardest and best decision I ever made. That April in Anchorage, adamant job searching and praying provided exactly what I needed to fulfill that ambition. I made the move June 1st, and of course a year after that, we finally made that trip to Illinois where I agreed to marry him.

The end.

 There you have it. Dang. If you read this far, my thanks and apologies to you lol. Hopefully you’re not as exhausted as I am right now. But like I said, I love retelling the story of our very unlikely meeting and everything we’ve been through since. If life had gone according to my own plans, I would have stayed in Tucson at U of A for nursing school and never leavig Arizona. Chamberlain College of Nursing was my last resort after months of disappointment. Thankfully, God was faithful despite my apprehensive trust and in time transformed my heartache into pure joy. My deepest longing is a marriage that mirrors that kind of faithfulness. I can’t wait to have that with Cory. And to be Mrs. Catherine Joy Evans :)
 
 

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